How to Love (Mindfulness Essentials)

This is a beautiful third novella in the Mindfulness Essentials series, focusing on love and kindness. It can be read by anyone, you don’t need to have read any of the other books in the series. The book is made up of short, poetic chapters featuring teachings and insights by Thích Nhất Hạnh. At the end, it includes mindfulness practices and mantras. The relatable tone is easy to read and presented in an accessible, non-judgmental way. The principles offer guidance not only on romantic love, but also on platonic, familial and self-love. One of the key concepts explored throughout the book is the Four Elements of True Love: loving-kindness, compassion, joy, and equanimity. This is a lovely, concise work that blends practical advice, like mindful breathing and compassionate listening, with deep philosophical insights about life and love. I really loved this simple, heartfelt little book, it’s something anyone can pick up and find something meaningful about love. Favorite Quotes: “The more you understand, the more you love; the more you love, the more you understand. They are two sides of one reality. The mind of love and the mind of understanding are the same.” “Mindful living is an art, and each of us has to train to be an artist.” “Understanding someone’s suffering is the best gift you can give another person. Understanding is love’s other name. If you don’t understand, you can’t love.”

I am not a self-help book type of person, and I used to take a weird kind of pride in that. But when my partner of 12 years left me last spring, it disrupted my life in ways I couldn't just shrug off. At a friend's recommendation, I bought this book with a big dose of skepticism. My first read through was fast - not because of the simplistic language and ideas, but because I was looking for the answers to my questions and solutions to my problems. On my second read, I slowed down and appreciated the surface messages and the beautiful language. I'm on my 10th or 11th read through this book, and often pick it up to read passages whenever I'm feeling down to spark good, healthy thinking (I'm so anti-self-help I still have an aversion to calling it "meditation"). But the book itself won't make you better: you have to put in the work and learn to be whole. The book is there to provide healthy relationship goals, but in the end, you always need to be responsible for your own happiness. If there are any shortcuts, I haven't found them yet. The author gives wonderful guidance and advice, and provides good descriptions of what a loving relationship should be. I don't agree 100% with everything in the book, but it's full of beautiful intentions and open-hearted encouragement.

I chose this rating because it is an easy read with meaningful teachings. I have been practicing some of the teachings for a week now and already feel better. More true to myself helping to be true to others. I would recommend this book to anyone who has room for improvement in their self being, which is most people!!

I love these books. They are thought provoking and also easy to apply to life. Easy to recall and are an open hearted approach to love and kindness. No blame - self reflection. I would like to express though that this particular Love seems to be centered about an intimate relation not necessarily a friendship or platonic relationship but around maybe someone you live with like a husband or partner or significant other. I was looking for something that touch on platonic friendships. Women specifically-we can be a tough crew.

I can't tell you how elated I am to have been recommended this very profound yet quick read that kept me riveted from beginning to end... I finished it in about 2 days reading from my kindle app on my phone as well as the PC Amazon Cloud Reader version while multitasking at work... VERY inexpensive and well worth ingesting..... The title may be simple but this is not some elementary manual on "love" in the commercially personified or rudimentary way.... Rather it is a very deep and conscious guide towards loving with more than words or emotions or in idealized concept..... I really feel this book is VITAL for every human being to read... The principles in this book speak to a deeper consciousness to foster healthier relationships with every love in your life-- spouses/mates/friends/ siblings/ family/ children etc . It's only 118 pages and visually spaced for a quick and easy flow. It's the kind of book you read and some months or years later re-read again like it's the first time all over .... Consider it a life manual to keep referring back to... I implore you to take the time to ingest this important spiritual work....... and may it enrich you as greatly as it has enriched me....

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"To love without knowing *how* to love wounds the person we love." Such a simple sentence with so much wisdom packed in one sentence. This distinction between the feeling of love and the skill to love is an important one. We all know that but never have I had a teacher clearly identify the differences between true love and unhealthy attachments so clearly. And lo and behold, true love is not about identifying and fixing the deficiencies in others, but rather, cultivating love and healing in yourself first. If we love with a wounded, desperate heart, we do great harm to others and only perpetuate our own suffering while creating fresh trauma for others. And on and on it goes. This lovely book has inspired me to do more work on my own wounds while reminding me of simple, powerful practices to show love for my spouse and children. Listen deeply. Show the same reverence that you offer an honored guest. Cultivate joy at every opportunity.

I love Thich Nhat Hanh's writings, and this book presents ideas that I have not heard elsewhere. Wonderful ways to bring loving thoughts and actions into your life.